Good morning to all you wonderful people out there. I just love WOYWW and would not miss it for anything. (If you still don't know what I am talking about, then just follow the link and all will be revealed by the lovely Julia) As you can see, I am currently making use of the 'shove to the side' method to make some space on my workdesk. I have had a cardmaking frenzy during the weekend and while mr. Mojo was being kind, didn't want to waste any time cleaning.
You can stop reading here if you are from WOYWW, because the rest of this post is going to be personal and possibly boring.
The 23rd of September is a public holiday over here in South Africa, it is Heritage Day, the day where we celebrate our different cultures. Thirteen years ago, this was also one of the most horrible days I have ever lived through.
My DH has a friend that has been his best friend since grade 3. The two of them have been friends for all these years and luckily for them, the wives became firm friends too. Their two kids and our middle two kids were born a month apart and we often joked that they were confused as to which house and which family they all belonged to, because they were so close.
I realised with shock this weekend that it has been 13 years since that horrible day when Bernard and Ann's daughter Tanya was killed in a car crash. I will never forget that day. We got a phone call in the middle of the night from Bernard's brother to tell us what had happened. They went camping for the weekend and Tanya, her friend Natalie and the friend's BF were only leaving later that day after the BF finished work. They never arrived and did not answer phones. Bernard and his brother started searching for them and was told that there had been a horrific accident near Witbank. When they got to the police station, they discovered that both Tanya and Natalie were killed and the BF was fighting for his life..
Bernard's brother told us that they were on their way home, by now it was about 2 in the morning. We were looking after their dogs and had a key for their house. I was in total shock, but just knew that there was NO WAY that those two people would come home in the middle of the night to a dark house. We got up and went to their house to switch lights on for them.
The first thing I saw when I walked in, was Tanya's motorcycle helmet, felt like a punch in the stomach. I picked it up to put it in her room and when I walked in, her Matric Dance dress was hanging on the pelmet in front of me.
I can not remember much of the days that followed, just the pain and the numbness. My dear, dear friend had to endure and the helpless feeling of not knowing what to say or do. I remember that I told her that I had no words, but that I would give her a hug every day for as long as she needed it and it was almost 2 years before the day came that she told me she was OK and did not need a hug that day. She still comes for that hug sometimes. Bernard and my DH used to walk the streets in our suburb. Often returning after hours with red eyes, but never talking about what was said during those walks,
The happiest days in my life will always have some sadnes to it. When my DD got married, when she had her babies and when she graduated from school - all such happy days, but all a reminder that our dear friends would never have that with their daughter. This weekend my DH and I were talking about that day (as we always seem to do at this time of the year) and realised it has been 13 years. It feels like yesterday in some respects and I know that my friend's pain will always be there, no matter how many years pass. All I can do is give her a hug and pray that God will give them the strength to get through another year without their child.
To dearest Tanya, you may be gone, but you will never be forgotten.