What I see.

I finally found my scrapping Mojo. I think he was hiding behind the mess in my scraproom, because as soon as I cleaned, out he popped! These photo's of Ankie was taken on the day of her birthday. I followed her around the house and begged for some photo's. My kids know better than to refuse their mother when she has a camera in her hand and that 'look' on her face, but as you can see from the photo's, even Ankie runs out of patience every now and again. It makes for a pretty good page though. LOL





The papers I used are all Bazzil and Fabscraps. Other than that there is not nuch to this page. A few white flowers that I attacked with my Copics, brads by Enmarc. Ribbon from my stash and lace from my sewing basket (left over from a dress I made for Ankie when she was about two years old!)

The file on the right hand page contains a letter written to her. The front says: Highly Confidential.

The journaling reads:

My dearest Ankie Bankie,

Today is your 22nd birthday. It was so nice to have you at home and to be able to sing to you at 6 this morning. You will never know how much it means to us that you wanted to be nowhere else on your birthday. Thank you for allowing me to follow you around with my camera.

When I look at these pictures now, I think of so many things. To other people these may just be a couple of photo's of a silly, beautiful girl, but I see so much more when I look at them.

I see you walk away from me in grade 1. Your pigtails bouncing on your shoulders. You didn't even look back at me once, you were too excited to finally be able to go to 'big school' like your brother and sisters. Little did you know that I cried all the way to my school about my baby that grew up so fast.

I see you cross the line at your first athletics meeting, straight into your daddy's arms. I see him catch you with tears in his eyes. Neither of us could believe that there finally was a little Jacobs that inherited his sporting talent. And didn't you inherit it!!

I see you telling me, hand on the hips, that your teacher was 'stupid'. Why did you have to run over and over, they KNOW you are the fastest! It took you very long to understand why you should train when everything came so easily for you.

I see the tears shoot from your little eyes the day that the Neurologist diagnosed you with Epilepsy. Not because you had Epilepsy, but because he said that you should stop doing sport. He felt so sorry for you that he said you could try to carry on with your sport but you should stop if you had another seizure. Afterward he told me that we should not expect too much from you. Little did he know just how far you would go!

I see you walk away from me the first day of school in grade 6. That day you were just as brave as in grade 1. It was your first day at an English medium school and you saw it as just another adventure that you took on with such enthusiasm.

I can still clearly see you slam the car door after you first Netball practise at St Dominic's, proclaiming that these English girls play like 'fairies'! The teacher had to call you aside and ask you not to throw the ball so hard, because you were 'winding' the girls! I see you refuse to play badly just because they couldn't catch a ball and I can still see how they get better and better untill your team beat a few Afrikaans schools.

I see the day you recieved your South African colours for Water Polo for the first time. I also see how you stayed yourself through it all. I see your friends and team mates follow you, not because they have to, but because they can't help wanting to be near you and to be inspired by you.

I remember the day when one of your friends asked you why you have Epilepsy. You didn't know I heard and I held my breath waiting for the answer. Your answer? God gave me so many talents that He had to make sure that I remember that I am no better than anybody else, thats why He gave me Epilepsy. I was so proud at that moment. No bitterness, no questioning, just acceptance of something that so many people use as an excuse not to live their lives to the full.

Today you are a grown woman, that gives so much back. I watch you when you play and coach. I see how the girls hang on your every word. I see them blindly trust you and do whatever you ask. I see how other schools approach you with better offers to came and coach at their schools and I hear you tell them: Thank you so much, but I am happy where I am.

In you, my child, I see all the qualities I would love to have: humility,loyalty, perserverance, wisdom way above your years and still... a little girl thet hasn't forgotten how to play.

My birthday wish for you my dearest child is that all your dreams will come true and that every child that has the priviledge to be coached by you will learn what it is to be a true sports person. I am so proud of everything you have achieved, but more so of the amazing person you are.

One day, when I am big I would love to write a book about you and all the hurdles you had to overcome to achieve what you have and still will.

Love you

Mom